Love Always, Little Sister

Love Always, Little Sister

He always felt the guilt inside, i know because i felt it too

The stinging pang with every memory, every tear drop lost

I keep his picture by my bed, and wonder if he has mine as well

Does he ever think of Dad, of mom, but most of all of me?

I've memorized that day so well, of when we last met in memory

I can still feel the fabric of your shirt, see the glint of your glasses

But I could never hear your voice.

I think it hurt the most to know, we lost dad so long ago

and that even though you needed it, i wasn't there for you

I wasn't there to reminiss, or share his happy thoughts

We never talked about his books, or pens, or legal pads gallore

I can never directly say this, because that's really just who i am

I could never tell you how much I miss him desperately

and how somedays i just don't want to wake up without my dad

How it's such a bitter reminder to see my friends and their dads

laughing and joking around.

How i couldn't even look at my own cousin, because she still had her dad

I don't think i could ever tell you how much it hurt to realize

the one person that i needed most when i lost dad was you

But you couldn't be there, because we had seperate lives

it's true, i could never tell you these things directly.

But what i can tell you now, is how happy i was

I saw your baby girl, your beautiful wife, and smiling face

I got to hug you again, and joke about the bookmarks i "misplaced"

The best part is, for once, i could think of dad and it didn't hurt

I could see his smile and hear his laugh, and remember us together

So if i can thank you for nothing else directly, Thank you for being

My brother

So I'll sign this like i always do, with a little heart or two.

Just remember big brother, I love you
Love Always, Little Sister